Acura Integra - I have always wanted to own the Buick of
Acura Legend - I'm too bland for German cars.
Acura NSX - I am impotent.
Audi 90 - I enjoy putting out engine fires.
Buick Park Avenue - I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Cadillac Eldorado - I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
Cadillac Seville - I am a pimp.
Chevrolet Camaro - I enjoy beating the hell out of people.
Chevrolet Chevette - I like seeing people's reactions when
I tell them I have a 'Vette.
Chevrolet Corvette - I'm in a mid-life crisis.
Chevrolet El Camino - I am leading a militia to overthrow
Chrysler Cordoba - I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
Datsun 280ZI - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel-well.
Dodge Dart - I teach third grade special education and I
voted for Eisenhower.
Dodge Daytona - I delivered pizza for four years to get
Ferrari Testarossa - I am known to be in therapy .
Ford Fairmont - (See Dodge Dart)
Ford Mustang - I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Crown Victoria - I enjoy having people slow to 55mph
and change lanes when I pull up behind them.
Geo Storm - I will start the 11th grade in the fall.
Geo Tracker - I will start the 12th grade in the fall.
Honda del Sol - I have always said, half a convertible is
better than no convertible at all.
Honda Civic - I have just graduated and have no credit.
Honda Accord - I lack any originality and am basically a
Infiniti Q45 - I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits
Isuzu Impulse - I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or
Jaguar XJ6 - I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is
in the shop 280 days per year.
Sephia - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp.
Lamborghini Countach - I only have one testicle.
Lincoln Town Car - I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
Mercury Grand Marquis - (See above)
Mercedes 500SL - I will beat you up if you ask me for an
Mercedes 560SEL - I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son
Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen
MGB - I am dating a mechanic.
Mitsubishi Diamante - I don't know what it means either.
Nissan 300ZX - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Oldsmobile Cutlass - I just stole this car and I'm going to
make a fortune off the parts.
Peugeot 505 Diesel - I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
Plymouth Neon - I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena.
Pontiac Trans AM - I have a switchblade in my sock.
Porsche 911 Turbo - I wear a hairpiece.
Porsche 944 - I am dating big-haired women that otherwise
would be inaccessible to me.
Rolls Royce Silver Shadow - I think Pat Buchanan is a tad bit
Saturn SC2 - (See Honda Civic)
Subaru Legacy - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more
inferior than Isuzu.
Toyota Camry - I am still in the closet.
Volkswagen Beetle - I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
Volkswagen Cabriolet - I am out of the closet.
Volkswagen Golf (Tan) - I am a loser with a piss ass job, a
raging lunatic and smelly breathed geeky wimp.
Volkswagen GTI - I am very intelligent, good looking, great
disposition, down to earth, and hung like a yak.
Volkswagen Microbus - I am tripping.
Volvo 740 Wagon - I am frightened of my wife
This is brilliant.... Where did you get this Wayne?